After a quiet night, I stirred at 9:30, went upstairs and promptly went back to sleep in front of the fire. There was no alternative as it was dumping with snow outside and G was pottering around pretending to be too busy to talk to me. And it stayed like that until after lunch when the whole day went “tits up” as the humans say.
It started when G decided to shift some snow from behind his car. To be fair there was a huge amount of snow and another car was almost completely buried. I decided to roll around in the powder and great fun it was. Then I got a whiff of a food trail and decided to wander off through the fields and adjacent chalets. I could hear G calling and blowing his silly whistle. But I was free of the collar of punishment and decided to follow my nose and ignore the old codger. This is the point where our stories diverge somewhat.
I found that the road had been cleared and pottered all the way down to check out the sausage and fried chicken shop in the village. When I got there, there were several kids to play with but the kindly lady who ran the shop made it pretty clear she did not want me testing the products. I heard her call the Gendarmerie to report me as “unaccompanied”. I guess they then called the old codger as he pitched up and arranged for Bernie to chauffeur us both back to the kennel. It was once we got back in that I heard the other side of the story as G grassed on me to Lady B on the phone.
His version is that I went AWOL and he tried to follow my tracks through the snow. Some chance but he made it through to the main road. I was nowhere to be seen so he locked up the kennel and walked all the way down to the village. He reports me as missing to the cops and wanders around hoping to find me. Eventually he took the bus back up to the kennel and just as he got there, the cops called to say I was enjoying myself at the sausage shop. So G turns round and promptly gets the same bus back down to find me. Having done that, the silly fool realized that he had lost his keys somewhere along the way, and he had to call the Saint Bernard to come to pick us up and use his spare key to let us in.
Having got back, they had some tea but I got the distinct impression that I was in the doghouse. I heard G dramatizing the whole thing in telephone calls to Lady B and Mrs Blue Rinse. I couldn’t see what the fuss was all about. I had had a good time and eventually we were all reunited.
He needn’t go on about it. He is now saying that because the keys were lost, he will have to go to the shops tomorrow to order new locks. Strikes me he could do with taking a bit more care of his things and not just blame me. But as is normal with humans, the first option is to kick the dog and I fear a day or two of extensive tethering and a few shots from the collar of punishment. Truly a dog’s life today.
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